Bestest friends!

My girls are so lucky to have such great friends. All of them support us in our hopes to adopt again!
We are so grateful that our girls have their best friends too. Once and a while the girls will play with their bears or dolls and play mommy! Yesterday, Aria put her baby in time out until she could be happy again! Some one listens too me!!! And they will be great big sisters again someday!

Worries, Myths and ?'s

SO... many hopeful adoptive couples and families have a few worries and myths that I want to share in this post...( random pics of our zoo trip too)

For some reason these have been on my mind a bit as I've been spreading the good word of adoption and talking with couples and high school aged teens and friends...

Why haven't we been chosen after 18 months, 2 years etc??? ( not us, just a ? from a few couples)
Couples who wait are not hopeless. I feel that our wait time is part of the process of learning and growing and preparing. Couples with long waits often get the blues but, usually that can be remedied by GETTING BABY OFF THE BRAIN and getting involved in other causes instead of just doing nothing. A good cause is adoption and FSA is a great wait to advocate and outreach, often through this contacts are made and placement is more likely to happen ( and time flies faster). One of my best friends in Henderson, NV waited for 3 years and after getting involved in FSA, she was placed 3 months later. Get involved with your agency and your community. And GOD knows what we need when we need it! Including Adoption!


Are birth parents expecting to share parenting with adoptive parents after placement?
Not particularly. And not on a daily basis. Most birth parents love to HELP with baby when they are over for visits and that is ,normally, very special bonding time. Day to day decisions are made by the Adoptive parents. We consult with Kara when we feel she needs to be included in the decisions and we share our decisions with her so, she knows how we are raising OUR CHILD
( hers and ours combined) . BP's are NOT going to take over just b/c you want openness. That's silly!


Is having your birth mom stay with you guys weird?
For us, NO! It depends on EVERY couple and every placement situation. We had Kara stay with us for 6 days and it was great ( a tad hard for her with her baby boy who is 11 months) but, so wonderful to have her here. We share some responsibilities while we are together like cooking, party prep, getting Pj's on, reading stories, getting special Party dresses on, kids loaded in cars etc... And It works for US. We hope to go camping with her whole extended family this summer too, if possible! We love them all!


What if you don't know all the health history of the child you adopt?( like if Birth father is unknown)
Does one ever know, even with biological children? Your great grandfather could have passed down something to a bio child and you may have no clue. Obviously, with open adoption we get to chat about everything from allergies to eczema. Openness helps eliminate the ?'s but , if Birth father isn't present we may just have to get some super serious blood work done. Not a worry to me!

What do you call Brielle's birthmom when she is there? What does Brielle Call her?
We all call her Kara and Brielle tells everyone that She is her Tummy Mommy or her birth mommy! She knows all of this b/c we have explained, in 5 year old detail ,that God needed YOU ( Brielle) to be born to Kara so, that she could find us and we could all be a big family. She knows how Special she is to have 2 mommies and likes to brag about it a tad. Aria( bio daughter) thinks it's odd to have only 1 mommy:)


How come some birth parents choose to just be semi- open? Why isn't it all or nothing?
Well, I'm not a birth parent but( back me up here BP friends) It's really a choice each expectant parent has to make depending on where they are at in life and every other factor that could possibly matter to them. 2 of my birth mom cousins have 2 different relationships with their AP's. One is Semi- open/Open ( sees him once a year or more) And the other is semi-open/closed ( no one outside of her parents have ever seen him or a picture of him). It's up to the individual and We ( AP's) shouldn't ever push a BP to do what WE want - ever!


What if we aren't chosen because of our_______? ( they have kids already, religion, place or residence, occupation of adoptive father? We can't change these things so then what?

Oh, the bLaNkS!!! I hear this a lot. All i can say is- the right BP will find and select you, if it FEELS right to her/them. Sometimes things matter to some people and sometimes they

don't. I guess you just have to be true to who you are and hope for the best. I also encourage AP's after 3 years or more of waiting to start checking out all their adoption choices. Look into other agencies, expand your willingness to accept things you thought you wouldn't, look into foster care and get confirming feelings on your choices. God does NOT care how your children come into your family- only that they get there!


What does Brielle's call her Birth Grandparents?
Grandma Dawn and Grandpa Phil! They are always going to call them that and rightfully so! I used to freak about that but, as time has gone by, i realized that it hurts NO ONE to have more grandparents. Aria calls them that too and they readily accept Aria as much as Brielle! We love them so much and they have already told us that they'd accept the next child/ren as well. You can never have too many people who love you!

Has Brandon Met his Birth family yet?
He has met one of his Sisters but, not his birth parents yet. We know, kind of, where they live and as a wife, I must be supportive of his decision to do this on his own timeline- not mine. Things are very different with his placement and eventually, I'm sure He will meet more of them! Time will tell!

Can Adoptive Couples be too guarded or too transparent online or in profiles?
Yes and NO. I think knowledge is power but, often Adoptive couples are afraid of getting scammed emotionally or financially so, they don't readily post phone numbers( real ones) or addresses until a expectant parent has made contact with their agency. Me, I'd put my # on here but, I'm afraid all the scammers would keep me up all night( tee hee)! So, if you want ours- shoot me an email and let me know that your human and not a hacker or spammer:) I do think you should devuldge as much info about WHO YOU ARE etc on your profile so, people can relate to you. Sometimes limited info on a blog comes off as " they're hiding stuff, what are they leaving out? They sound too perfect or fake. No one can agree with thier spouse 100% of the time. Who are they fooling by being so vague? etc" So, be true to you and only you!

Also here's a great page from a great agency about adoption myths found here!

And questions for expectant parents, about adoption here!

If anyone has ?'s please leave a comment or shoot us an email.

sometimes...

you have those days where you feel like the life has been sucked out of you by a shop-vac. Every ounce of you is drained and your fingers can barely move to type.
I stayed home ALL day today with the Girls b/c B's sick ( cough-nothing major) so, i did laundry, played with the girls, built a blanket fort, kinda did dishes, and did an overhaul on the Navigator and it's sparkling clean now! The leather, floors, mats, windows everything! There's nothing like a clean car! I got to chat with my friend Hales in Scottsdale and SKPYE with my family and my littlest brother, Brent! He's is heading off to Afghanistan in the Marines and that may be the last time we get to do that with him. We shall see. He's a strapping young man and I'm totally proud of him. Also, my friend Jessica is in training in the ARMY to head there in a few weeks too! So, i will have a few cool peeps over there. I wonder how much a box costs to ship there?

I'm also rounding out the midpoint of some hard core dieting and weight loss. Not that i was huge balloon but, i had some luv to peel off. I only have 12 lbs to go and I'm back to my size in college! I'm stoked but, it's draining too. Not to mention all the brain power i've been exerting to get all the new Central Region stuff in order for the next conference call! I LOVE FSA and am so glad I get to be involved and be an Aid to the awesome Central Region Area! I could just gush all day about these cool fsa chairs in each states and area! but, I'm tired. Sometimes, all the daily grind just wears you paper thin and then it's time to hit the hay. And try and make the most of the next stretch of sunlight!

Royalty...

We are ALL Royalty to GOD!

Every infant, child, man and woman! No matter where we live, what we drive, who we know, how we spend our time, God is still our Father in Heaven. And He is Our KING!

This hangs in my girls room to remind them everyday who they are!

And although I DETEST pageants for tiny kiddos, I do have a few tiaras around and on a few things, like these piggy banks!( they have tutus on too). I never want my kids to think that they are not worth anything to us and to God and Jesus Christ! We constantly remind them of all the people who love them. From birth family to extended family and friends, they know they are loved everyday!

Brielle asked me last night..." Mommy, are princesses real?" i replied "Yes, Brielle, they are real and YOU are one of them b/c you are a Daughter of our Heavenly King, Our Father in Heaven, And He loves you and wants to see you behave like a princess everyday!" Her eyes got big and she said " I wish i could see God again but, i don't want to die yet" .
So innocent and sweet. I about lost it! I wish everyone in the world knew of their own worth in God's eyes! We are all truly ROYALTY, now let's behave like we are everyday!

*pics from top to bottom:
tiara from B's cake i made
sign i made with vinyl and real crystal mini tiaras, paint and ribbon
piggy banks i ordered plain and decorated with tutus and tiaras
tiara we bought Brielle for her 5th B-day!

Casting Stones and Judgment

(this is a RANT post- just so, you are ready)

Lately, i've been reading a few birth mom blogs
( they give me strength and courage and hope) and i have been improving our profile , adding new and updated pictures and trying to figure out why my header is so dang blurry when in PS it's not!!! (I have re-sized it like 10 times-grr- as to not compress too many pixels)

Anyway, I have been thinking about what the world must think of both birth parents and adoptive parents.
Those who are not in our adoption world, say disgusting things about us like: "who'd ever give a child up, must be crazy" "adoptive parents only care about themselves" Parents who want to adopt more kids than 1 or 2 are baby hoarders and selfish people- be grateful you have any" " how could you think that someone could love a baby that is not of their own blood?" " I'd never adopt- i don't want to be a permanent uncle" " people who are adopting kids are noble"( i hate that one) .. YOU GET MY POINT....

These uneducated people have wasted too many days dissing and putting down all of us!
Birth parents are NOT CRAZY or Selfish and KNOW that Bonds are formed stronger with those not of our blood ( think about your spouse, boyfriend, or best friends- they are not blood). And those who even consider adoption as an option are thinking about the well being of their child- not themselves at all!!! They don't want to end up a statistic of what happens to unwed couples: poor, on welfare, unmarried, lack of education, and bound for pregnancy again.
Expectant parents are considering all the options on how to give this tiny little being the BEST chance for success and LOVE and happiness possible. And Adoptive couples are like that beacon of light at the end of a long and dark tunnel.

When people say things to me or others ( like the above mentioned) I normally impart a bit of wisdom with kindness. AP's are NOT baby hoarders or greedy or permanent uncles. They do not seek to take away a precious being and leave BP's empty handed. AP's are normally LOVING and have open arms ready to receive the BP's as a new part of their family! YEP, more and more couples are choosing open adoptions and all involved have benefited, immensely. We are trying to BE NOBLE, just hoping to be parents to a child/ren for the first, second or 10th time!

I hope that you, who read this, impart wisdom to those who knock adoption down. Stand up for what adoption really is : A Beautiful, Heavenly, Miracle! And to keep it this way AP's must be totally honest with their birth parents and vice versa. Communication is KEY to success with open adoption and we all need to stop Casting stones or judging people who are not " JUST LIKE US". If i were a world leader, I'd want everyone to take a step back and look at how we are ripping apart one another instead of building up each other. We need to be more CHRISTIAN and less Narcissistic!

I'm not going to lie. I know we are judged everyday. Even by birth parents looking for their match. We may have too dark of hair, too many kids, too many freckles, not the right house or job or pet, not enough education and what have you... But, that kind of Judgment, i can take b/c i know it will lead someone special to their family and someone even more incredible to ours! Just be a little easier on all of us, world of critics! Sit in our shoes for a day, deal with infertility while everyone around you breathes and gets pregnant.Willing to give a limb and everything in your bank just to have a child. Or try being a pregnant, 20 something with a huge weight on her shoulders, not knowing where to turn. I DARE YOU- THEN see if you can cast stones at us! You wouldn't last a minute!!!

~C

A great read

from a great birth mother! Click here!
read it when you have about 5 mins. to let it all sink in.
This article reaffirms that Adoption is a Miracle and such
an unselfish act of true LOVE!

still playing catch up

so, I'm still way behind on editing our own photos. I'm having tons of fun doing everyone's, though! Here's the girls in their fancy Christmas Dresses. Much more photos of December to come...( yep far behind- i know)

here's a few from our family shoot too. We have way too much fun being crazy in love! I am so blessed to have husband who is my best friend and such a great daddy to our girls! Both his parents and his birth-mom should be so proud of the man he is today!!!

Here's our fabulous Blue STEEL!

another name off the list

Tommy and Annie have adopted so, they too are off the waiting couples list:) Congrats!


*pic by Corrine:)

my awesome friend

Dara, is all into the cupcake scene! Here's what she's offering to Denver area residents! Call to order!!!

The Zoo

this trip was a bit different...

since we went in the winter, we hit up most of the inside exhibits!
and played a bit outside too!

and went with our awesome friends!!!

the girls wanted to stay at the zoo, even if they had to climb a tad to have their own space. We said no, of course!

some monsters liked the kids

the monkeys were hilarious!

It was great having Uncle Todd( my single, older brother) with us too! He lives in SD , where they have a fabulous zoo too! He said this one was pretty great too!

We wore the girls out and they all slept well on the ride home. We picked up Cafe Rio that day for dinner. The sweet pork is delectable!

It was a GREAT wintry day!

thank goodness

We LOVE SNOW!!!

we were BORN to live in CO!

Even if it's a little freezing at times!

We love being mom and dads little snow angels!

and we can't wait to play in the snow again.

Maybe, by next winter, we will have a baby brother or sister to play with us???

another name off the list...

Eric and Christy have adopted and we are so excited for them!!! Congrats! Open adoption is AWESOME!!!

things are getting colder...

...here in CO! And we are having such fun with all the snow!!!

Except when we are talking about my inexperienced driving skills! Yep, the truth is coming out folks!
I SLID on the ice and my tires hit the curb. It was super scary but, i was going slow enough no major damage happened. I busted our wheel and baring and that's about it and it took 2 weeks to get that all fixed! I thankfully have many great friends who lent us their extra car while all the repairs were being made. ( em and trev)

So, the fun stuff now... We LOVE to sled and make snow angels and anything we can do in the snow! Emily and i even jumped on the tramp with 6 inches of snow on it! It was chilly but, hilarious!!!



Today was the 2nd REAL snowfall this winter and now that my Navigator is back, i plan on driving like a granny and keep my 4WD on!!!

I love how the snow makes everything so clean and bright. It's so romantic, peaceful, heavenly and freakin' freezing. Everyone tells me there much more winter to come so, i better be prepared. I'm stoked that we live here and get to experience all these wonderful seasons. God is so good!

*keep reading or click on the upper tabs to learn more about Brandon, Corrine and their family and desire to adopt again!

Report on the party...

So Much Fun, 13 little girls, 1 little boy. Tea party with a 3 course meal. Sleeping Beauty came and performed and played and we took pictures and did make up and games. Lots of cake and ice cream, and running around, musical chairs and gifts and friends. I'm BEAT and so ready to hit the hay.I LOVE PARTIES, just a tad more toned down. I am congested, my feet hurt and so does my brain. Next time a birthday comes i will either hire it all out or take some of the friends to ski or a water park( summer b-days) . So much easier. I literally had 5-6 people help with this massive tea party. SO MUCH FUN but, so much work. More pictures to come...


Dara covered the cake with buttercream fondant and i made the crown,5, and cakes and iced them. It was a great team effort!
It was fantastic having Kara there too. Kara is a great birthmom!!! We are so blessed!!!

Can't wait to have another amazing adoption in our family. Open adoption is like adding more people to your family, who you will be forever connected with b/c f this amazing miracle! I LOVE IT!!!

Adoptive couples retreat

Check out this link for a cool retreat in OREM, UT for adoptive couples. Worth going to if you live in that area!

Today...

We finally started to take down the decorations from Christmas! Yep, I'm a procrastinator with that. I feel like the season of giving leaves all too fast. There is a great song in the Forgotten Carols that says" I cry the day we take the tree down"... I feel all blue about it.
Now we have to wait another year. Even though the outward signs are not there anymore, i still feel the Spirit Of Christmas in my Heart all the time. Forgive me for sounding a bit cheesy but, I do have a great love for everyone in the world and i wish and hope for everyone to be happy and loved! I love sharing and giving and helping! I love it when my friends do those things for me too. It's the Spirit of Christ in us all that makes us want to do the right thing and love and serve those we know or come in contact with. ( thanks to Kara for all the help with the tree and dishes:)

I cleaned up the storage room and moved boxes all around and it stunk but it's done and much cleaner. I made some poufs for Alli's Party tomorrow that will become the tops of fairy
wands , took Baby Judd's pictures for my long time friend, Annie, who just recently adopted this sweet boy! And took some of Junior too ( Kara's Son). I made Brielle's tiara cookies for her class and a gorgeous necklace for one of her birthday gifts. She has been asking for me to make her a new necklace for a while now. She really wanted purple in it too!
And I printed out tons of papers for tomorrow's Adoption Presentation. Tomorrow Kara and I ( and maybe Jessica) will speak at a High School. I haven't done this for a year now but, I am excited to share my love for adoption and dispel myths about it too!
Adoption Advocacy is MY CALLING in life right now! I'm so happy to do it and i know that this is Where God Needs me to be!
~C



*oh, and here's a pic of the cupcake i made for her REAL birthday day! Her PARTY cake will be on Saturday!!!
( Brielle cut out the star too)

Brielle's Getting Older

Once this girl was tiny and small....

growing inside this angel's belly...

and 5 years ago, she was born to a lovely young woman, her first mother, Kara...

who only weeks before she was due, found US and chose us to be her parents...

We met on Jan. 2nd and that day changed our lives forever. Then met again on the 9th and

on the 12th of January, This precious Girl came into the lives of Many and has been since LOVED BY MANY b/c of Open Adoption!

Please look at our old family Blog for all the details on her adoption and her life thus far! click on Brielle or adoption day:)

And now, We Wait for Another Miracle through Adoption!
She is the best Big sister and any child that comes into our family will have an older sister to relate to. Not to mention an Amazing Father( Brandon) who is also adopted. I'm so blessed and i hope we can all bless the next life that finds it's way into our family! Adoption is a Miracle and everyday I'm grateful for it! Especially today!

Aquarium trip

we had such a blast here!

the sea creatures were amazing!

uncle Todd was such a HAM!

And Brielle Loved to size up the big fish!

Nemo even had his own display area! ( looks like a screen saver, right?)

And the girls got to pet a real live tiger ( at least that what it looks like)

This big kitty loved Aria and wanted to play but, she refused him!

The Mermaids put on a great show and the girls were mesmerized!

This shark was really smitten with these 2 girls!

I loved the silver metallic fish ( reminded me of all the cute handbags out right now)

Aria was instructing Brielle on how to plug her nose in case she wanted to go in!

This coral was breath-taking ( again- looks like a screen saver)

The big Cat keep staring me down. I have no idea why? Maybe it was b/c i smelled like steak?
( not really)

The Bubble dome thing was really cool.

Brielle was about ready to jump in this tank.

Aria loved the Aquarium and saying Hello to all the creatures. It was fun had by all!