The Christian Crew

lest ye be judged... Where am i going with this post? Well, in a few directions but these ones specifically The role of an adoption advocate ( referred to as AA) is NOT to COAX people into wanting to adopt a baby or to convince women to place their child with others ! The Primary ROLE of an AA is : To impart one's love of adoption, the testimony of what adoption is to you, to educate, dispel adoption myths and unify others in this great miraculous process. And even though we and others may be hoping to adopt- it is not really our duty to TELL others what they should do , or cast judgment upon someone b/c they choose to parent instead of place! AP's should be very wise to not be pushy with their unwed pregnant associates. They need to understand that we all have our agency and opinions and they will all be very different. And no potential birth mom should feel obligated or guilt tripped into placing their baby- if that is not where their heart is leading them to! Here's a...

like your inbox... or vice versa... You choose what to respond to and how to respond to it. You check boxes and clear out the clutter , leaving only the pertinent and personal emails left. But, sometimes we muse at the junk mail. The sales at Nordstrom or the funny pictures of a plumbers crack. We drift off into tangents and forget about the REAL stuff in our inbox that really needs our attention and communication. We wonder why we are SO BUSY when most of our time was actually wasted on CLEARING OUT THE JUNK! Maybe, if we had LESS junk coming in our lives - we'd be more focused, more in tune, more in touch with those PEOPLE and Purposes that matter to Us! We can always unsubscribe to those Lesser important things that distract us from what really matters but, do we? As my girls drift off to sleep in their soft cozy beds, with layers of quilts and blankets on this cold snowy night, I think about the choice brielle's birthmom made to think about the stuff that really mattered...

So funny! What I mean is adoptive couples can be so funny to think that they are competing with other adoptive couples. This last week I have talked with a few people who have helped me realize that my sunny outlook on adoption is not shared with everyone! Some people actually think that AP's are trying to one up each other to WIN a birth mom or a baby? That is so pathetic to hear. I also heard that some people feel entitled to ADOPT and that God or the Church OWES them b/c they've done everything right so, why should they be punished with infertility? It's that sense of entitlement that is the detriment of th ese poor hopeful couples. Adopting a baby is NOT a contest to be won and birth mothers are not to be poached or tricked by couples who are not being honest with them! That makes me so sick to my stomach and I'm sorry to say that these certain people need to understand the Atonement and their own personal relationship with God! When a birthmom s...

SO... many hopeful adoptive couples and families have a few worries and myths that I want to share in this post...( random pics of our zoo trip too ) For some reason these have been on my mind a bit as I've been spreading the good word of adoption and talking with couples and high school aged teens and friends... Why haven't we been chosen after 18 months, 2 years etc??? ( not us, just a ? from a few couples) Couples who wait are not hopeless. I feel that our wait time is part of the process of learning an d growing and preparing. Couples with long waits often get the blues but, usually that can be remedied by GETTING BABY OFF THE BRAIN and getting involved in other causes instead of just doing nothing. A good cause is adoption and FSA is a great wait to advocate and outreach, often through this contacts are made and placement is more likely to happen ( and time flies faster). One of my best friends in Henderson, NV waited for 3 years and after getting involved in FSA, she w...

Makes me Cry with JOY!!! I don't Care how, who, or where my future children come from. I don't care if my kids "match" my skin color. I don't even think twice about ME anymore b/c it's NOT about ME!!! It's about the children. I cry for different reasons all the time but, today, i cried watching a movie about a couple who adopted 2 babies from Ethiopia. It tugged at my heart strings and I remember meeting my friend Shay's newest Addition from Ethiopia. Her one and only Son, in house full of girls! He was gorgeous and so sweet and when i got to meet him, he was so friendly but, you could tell He knew who his mommy was. I asked Shay about why she chose Ethiopia- she said something like" it just felt like where we were being led to find him". I Often wonder if adoptive couples let themselves be LED in their adoption journeys anymore. I wonder the same thing for Birth Parents. I wonder if people are just going with the easiest, cheapest, or most...

Please take a second and read this awesome article on this blog !!! Birth Parents are AMAZING!!! this is a picture i took of 2 birth moms who placed with the same couple ( in the background) It's all about LOVE. ADOPTION is so amazing!!!

...are MANY right now, as we prepare for Halloween! Here's Brielle's Dorothy outfit ( minus tights and possible a COAT the way this week is going ( freakin' freezing people!!!)! I'm halfway through Aria's Glinda Costume and we found a sweet Green blazer for Brandon so he could be THE Wizard of Oz. I , of course, will be the only other female character... The wicked witch of the West. I HAVE NEVER BEEN a witch before( so i can recall) so, this will be a new experience for me. We have 4 parties coming up and tons of things to do before then too! My dad, Danny is in town and the girls are having so much fun with Grandpa! He read them stories tonight and i was finishing the outfit downstairs and could here them giggle and getting tickled and it made me think back to my childhood a bit! Man, i wish i would have enjoyed my youth even more than i had! It's so fleeting but so very powerful. What you do and hear in your youth effects you forever. I'm glad i get to ...

I just can't get enough! here's another stellar birth mother poem! I believe this with all my heart!

a fabulous poem is on this site. What an awesome Birth mother and individual!

Today, during a broadcast conference from leaders of our church, a phrase was repeated or paraphrased a few times over. This same theme was said in the conference for the 18+ female crowd at our RS conference, a week previous. This quote is one of my favorites and i have heard it for years and years. I first read it in a book by Stephen R. Covey - Spiritual Roots of Human Relations and I'm reading a book of his called the 7 Habits of Highly Effective Families- and he quoted this again. I finally found out where it originated from and here it is: David O' McKay, a prominent religious leader in our church,in 1954 stated that, " No success can compensate for failure in the home ." This is one of the wisest things i have ever heard- ever! Because- if you FAIL at being a GOOD and loving parent to your children- You will have God to deal with in the end. If you fail at work or making money but are a good parent- you just have creditors to deal with till you die. You may no...

check this post out! This couple say great things about adoption but the cover is totally misleading!

WOW! I feel like we are constantly on a roller coaster in our lives right now. I love to think that one of these weeks i will be less busy with things BUT, i find that to be totally a DREAM. IN FACT... I DON'T want to be less busy. I just want to be busy with different things like busy with a new child or baby, busy with MORE adoption work and helping others. Busy with doing FUN things with my girls or more dates with my husband! I feel like everything that's occupying our time is leading us up to something. You know like when you reach the top of a ladder or the top of a roller coaster and you here the clack, clack, clack right befo re the coaster throws you over the hump and you whiz down the chutes and through a tunnel then it throws you upside down and finally- you get to the part where it's starting to slow down to let you off the ride. Except we are still at the clack, clack part right before we are tossed in the air and down the side-winding turns of the life. Let...

I love the saying from CS Lewis : " You have not chosen one another, but I have chosen you for one another." This couldn't ring more true with the friendship We have with Jessica L. Here's our Story... We had just moved to CO 2 days prior. We attended the Adoption Training in CO before we even moved into our new house. It was wonderful and we were overjoyed that we were here finally and getting the process underway all at the same time. The 1st Sunday at church was Fast and Testimony Meeting. I bore my testimony and thanked those who watched my kids while we attended the adoption trainings. After the meeting a sweet lady in the hall asked me if we had been selected alr eady for   placement. I told her no, not yet and she began to tell me that she Knew someone looking into placing their unborn child for adoption . Her eyes welled up and she told me it was her daughter. I hugged her and she let it out and i told her "Well, God sure knew that i needed t...

Man, i feel like a bit of a basketcase somedays! The whole adoption process and waiting is sometimes overwhelming! I decided today- to FOCUS more on Where God is leading us to and not necessarily where I WANT TO GO! I mean that we are trying to LISTEN to the Holy Spirit more and where it's leading Our Family. I am so grateful for inspiration and peace that comes from doing what is right in our hearts. Lately, I've just struggled with the whole "waiting for someone to pick us" thing! I've come to the conclusion that : It will happen when it's RIGHT and meant to BE and that even though we put our whole hearts out there to be openly criticized by prospective birth parents- I"M OKAY with being picked apart. Someone may not like my dark curly hair. Someone may not like that Brandon is a mortgage lender and Real Estate Agent! They may judge us as un-cool b/c we have 2 kids and we are not "NEEDY enough". They may think we are total nerds or hate that ...

To all you who BLOG about your amazing adoption experiences: You must stop! I am up late at night reading your stories- crying with joy and sorrow and amazement of your strength. It's like a new addiction- all these bloggers who hit straight to the point about WHY you placed and you go into great detail about your choices and your life. Your posts give me strength in ways i thought i didn't need to be strengthened. i see how you advocate for adoption and LOVE IT. I am kind of envious that I'm not YOU. How did God make you Stronger in that way and Not me? I remember as a teen thinking that I'd love to surrogate for someone- just so, i could help them- no strings or money- just b/c i loved them and knew they were waiting for a child. Then i found out it's kind of frowned upon in our faith. Then i found out about my crappy PCOS and other reproductive issues. Anyway, I am so truly grateful you blog and keep me up all night. I enjoy the red in my eyes from time to tim...

If you are prospective birth parent - please read this letter by clicking on it to enlarge the text. If you are not, please note that this letter is not intended for your eyes but, you are free to read it nonetheless! Here's the poem i wrote after Brielle's birth mom told me that we were the gift she was giving her child. And she said she wasn't doing this for US- but for her Child! It was featured at the last LDS FSA National Conference Art Display! And the pictures are all adopted babies from the CO agency! For My Child A Birth mother's Song Looking in your eyes The Longing for a chance to be Parents to this child That will come from Me You Must feel Grief and Pain Many tears have been shed Sleepless nights you've wondered In Prayer you've bowed Your head. If you are like me, You've pleaded to God Above To Have some peace and Fill your home with LOVE And You May Say That You are so Thankful To receive this Tender Baby, Meek and Mild But, I want you to k...

So, I think he's a super handsome man. Others may disagree but, He needed a pic for his new Business Cards so, I took it! He's a Real Estate Agent with Metro Brokers and a Loan Officer as well! I am so glad he's a great man, husband, provider, friend and dad! I thank his parents for raising him and his birth mother for placing him over 31 years ago. You both are amazing for what you have done for him and for me and for our children!!! We are all so blessed through adoption!

Something i haven't really mentioned before is how we envision our family in the few years to come. I have always felt in my heart that we would have about 5-6 kids, maybe more. Most will come through adoption. I'm not an idiot and I'm not trying to be GREEDY, either! We just know what we know and feel that we have missing children in our family! It's like this huge part of my heart that aches daily. As each day passes, i feel more urgency to do something about it. But, i can only do what i can do and God plays the biggest part in this process. Then our future birth mother plays the next part and us the last part. We've always hoped for many races of children in our family. I actually thought i'd marry interracial but, who would have known I'd fall head over heels for a Blondy! I am so glad i did though:) Brandon is my perfect match, best friend and sweetest husband and father. That doesn't mean we always agree on everything(let's be real people) an...

Let me just start off by Saying How much i LOVE all the birth moms, fathers and grandparents i met at the conference. I am so inspired by your strength and courage and ability to overcome what non-adoptive people throw at you, verbally and emotionally. I met, Jill, Taryn, Celeste, Julie, Heather, Tamra and a whole bunch more awesome ladies! I adore you all and I can't wait till our awesome future birth parents find us:) I learned a TON at the conference about so many things and i could just write a book but, i will avoid it for time's sake. The highlights were too many to number. I can't wait until next year and will be BUSY at work with FSA. WHY? Because we love adoption and everyone involved in it and I was asked to Be the CENTRAL REGIONAL FSA C0-Chair with my sweet husband!!! That means that we will follow the direction of the National Board FSA leaders in guiding and helping the FSA Chapter Chairs in these states: Wyoming, Montana, Illinois, Ohio, Colorado, Missouri an...

I want to put some myths to rest about Adoptive Parents who already have a child, or two, adopted or biological. This is my opinion and maybe not everyone would agree but, I feel like i need to express these things- just to clear the air... Just because we HAVE kids- Does Not Mean that we aren't aching just as terribly for a child as those without children. Because we already know what being a parent feels like and requires of us, we may ache even more b/c we know the difference. It stinks to have these gnawing feelings in your heart and in your mind that " Someone is Missing- your family is NOT complete yet!" The sense of urgency most of us have is undeniable! I feel this every single day! I see it in my husbands face. My kids ask us all the time when our baby will come. I explain that God has to prepare a place in someone's heart for US! (the right person.) And that when She knows, then we will have another miracle in our family. And we must be as patient as we can...