The Christian Crew

Yep, that's what unpacking is. I'm totally surround by boxes in a much larger house with an incredibly busy husband who cant seem to find anytime to help. So, I'm conquering it all little by little. Today is the girls room tomorrow its half the boxes in the living room downstairs...and so on! My hopes are to plant a few seeds here and get the garden ready and to enjoy this change of pace in life. After our annual conference last weekend, i really felt many of the speakers reaching out to all of us and giving us needed direction and focus to work on being better parents and responsible citizens in our communities.... President Monson urged members to avoid the distractions of life and remember the things that are of greatest importance: family, service, and living the gospel. Dallin H. Oaks said: “Perhaps the most familiar and most important examples of unselfish service and sacrifice are performed in our families,” said Elder Oaks. Many also demonstrate unselfishnes...

Recently, there has been a mixed bag of emotions being thrown around FB and blogs and such ( what's new, right?) about Couples who have bio children and choose to pursue or even look into adoption. I fully understand that we all grieve in different ways and in different times in our process. I'm not asking anyone to speed through their emotions or telling you that what your thinking/ feeling is wrong. I just want you to take a moment to stop before you criticize, or throw out harmful words b/c you are so full of emotion and the desire to have a child. People have that same desire to serve and love and raise a child, regardless if they have children or not. Who are you to say things that make no sense at all like... " if you adopt a child and you already have kids, then that's one less baby for a couple without kids to have!" " why can't you just be grateful for what you have been given?" " Why don't you adopt an older kid from foster care- ...

lest ye be judged... Where am i going with this post? Well, in a few directions but these ones specifically The role of an adoption advocate ( referred to as AA) is NOT to COAX people into wanting to adopt a baby or to convince women to place their child with others ! The Primary ROLE of an AA is : To impart one's love of adoption, the testimony of what adoption is to you, to educate, dispel adoption myths and unify others in this great miraculous process. And even though we and others may be hoping to adopt- it is not really our duty to TELL others what they should do , or cast judgment upon someone b/c they choose to parent instead of place! AP's should be very wise to not be pushy with their unwed pregnant associates. They need to understand that we all have our agency and opinions and they will all be very different. And no potential birth mom should feel obligated or guilt tripped into placing their baby- if that is not where their heart is leading them to! Here's a...

Last night i had a dream... I was in the hospital room and we were there to see if Aria had swallowed something. The Dr. said he saw my stomach moving and wanted to do an ultrasound. The nurses all gathered around me and one said they could here 3 heart beats-mine and 2 babies. Aria was FINE and all the attention was turned to me now ( DREAMS ARE PRETTY ONE SIDED AND SELFISH USUALLY) . Well, the Dr. was taking a long time and i asked for a PT before he came. I didn't want to be disappointed like that again and i was lean and not looking prego. I get the test and Pee and it's PURPLE lines , not pink or blue! The nurses tell me it means multiples!!! Everyone was happy. I was ready for the dream to end b/c i figured out in my dream that it wasn't real and started waiting for the KICK . {enter the song FALLING to PIECES} I hear the music in the dream i know it's time to wake up now but, this dream feels so real and being a mommy again is what i desire most so, i wasn...

But, Like most AP's - it's hard not to fantasize or daydream about our next child to be. Most of us can't go an hour without thinking about what he or she will be like, what the birth parents will be like, if it's a boy or a girl, if it will be sooner than later etc... Some of us AP moms start putting together ideas of what the rooms, car seat covers, fit take home outfits, nursery toys, names etc... And maybe that is wasted time, just maybe but, I think it's also therapeutic and i like getting mentally organized a tad bit. B/c with adoption- you just never know when your day will come! And having dreams, wishes, hopes, is what keeps us going through all the hard things we face. Like little to no contacts from birth moms, being judged for one thing or another, failed placements or almost miracles, stress at work or what have you! If we all stopped dreaming and hoping- what would happen to us? Maybe we'd become more cynical or callus or might some of us just gi...

Today was one of those odd days ... The girls b-ball team i coach lost our first game since i've coached them and we got out of the tournament. We were missing one of our star players but, it makes no difference now. WE lost and it's okay. We will all go on and live our lives and learn from disappointment like everyone in the world does. We can't WIN all the time ( maybe Charlie Sheen can but, real people can't!) Anywho, after the Tourney we went to Colo. Springs to support our friends by sitting through an infertility seminar. Much of the info we already knew but, we learned great stuff nonetheless. Our friends are doing an embryo adoption and by us participating there today- they got to take off 100. per person who showed up! They had 32 people support them. We support all kinds of adoption and as much as I'd like to think about doing this, right now it just doesn't seem right for us. Not saying it would not be right in the future but, both of us just ke...

I really was trying to think what the title of my post today would be on. I understand that the world and values have changed. I also realize we all make our own choices in life and that's a gift we have been given- AGENCY! I could go into much detail about this but, in simplest terms: I'm using my Agency to FOCUS on my family , our hopes for adoption, advocating for adoption and loving those who are in my life. I'm not focusing on all the changes and moral shifts going on but, rather on keeping my boat steady as we parent in is crazy world. Our children (and all children that come into our family ) will know and learn the unchangeable Doctrines of God and Jesus Christ and the Love that He has for Them. I'm choosing everyday to focus on what matter's most. I may not have the latest shoes or handbag or sports car. You may not see me at the latest movie releases or trying to promote the latest fad in the economic climate. I won't waste my time on crap that...

I remember as a kid on Valentine's Day... My mom would make us pink pancakes or heart pancakes with berries, when we had them. It seemed as though every detail about that day was centered on how much she loved US! When we got home from school we had treats on our beds and nice card or letter. We often made jello jigglers hearts and mom made us something scrumptious for dinner. we'd watch old musicals or some love story type shows like Seven Brides for Seven Brothers or My Funny Valentine or whatever! She always made that day special for us. I never felt unloved by my mother and i don't think i really appreciated how much she really did for us and me until i became a mother! Thanks mom, for being my Valentine my whole young life. You did a great job and sacrificed so much for me to not end up rotten! I may not be a typical model of the perfect LDS/Christian person but, i know where my heart is centered and i know How much God loves me and loves everyone. Christ loves me ...

like your inbox... or vice versa... You choose what to respond to and how to respond to it. You check boxes and clear out the clutter , leaving only the pertinent and personal emails left. But, sometimes we muse at the junk mail. The sales at Nordstrom or the funny pictures of a plumbers crack. We drift off into tangents and forget about the REAL stuff in our inbox that really needs our attention and communication. We wonder why we are SO BUSY when most of our time was actually wasted on CLEARING OUT THE JUNK! Maybe, if we had LESS junk coming in our lives - we'd be more focused, more in tune, more in touch with those PEOPLE and Purposes that matter to Us! We can always unsubscribe to those Lesser important things that distract us from what really matters but, do we? As my girls drift off to sleep in their soft cozy beds, with layers of quilts and blankets on this cold snowy night, I think about the choice brielle's birthmom made to think about the stuff that really mattered...

So funny! What I mean is adoptive couples can be so funny to think that they are competing with other adoptive couples. This last week I have talked with a few people who have helped me realize that my sunny outlook on adoption is not shared with everyone! Some people actually think that AP's are trying to one up each other to WIN a birth mom or a baby? That is so pathetic to hear. I also heard that some people feel entitled to ADOPT and that God or the Church OWES them b/c they've done everything right so, why should they be punished with infertility? It's that sense of entitlement that is the detriment of th ese poor hopeful couples. Adopting a baby is NOT a contest to be won and birth mothers are not to be poached or tricked by couples who are not being honest with them! That makes me so sick to my stomach and I'm sorry to say that these certain people need to understand the Atonement and their own personal relationship with God! When a birthmom s...

you have those days where you feel like the life has been sucked out of you by a shop-vac. Every ounce of you is drained and your fingers can barely move to type. I stayed home ALL day today with the Girls b/c B's sick ( cough-nothing major) so, i did laundry, played with the girls, built a blanket fort, kinda did dishes, and did an overhaul on the Navigator and it's sparkling clean now! The leather, floors, mats, windows everything! There's nothing like a clean car! I got to chat with my friend Hales in Scottsdale and SKPYE with my family and my littlest brother, Brent! He's is heading off to Afghanistan in the Marines and that may be the last time we get to do that with him. We shall see. He's a strapping young man and I'm totally proud of him. Also, my friend Jessica is in training in the ARMY to head there in a few weeks too! So, i will have a few cool peeps over there. I wonder how much a box costs to ship there? I'm also rounding out the midpoi...

We are ALL Royalty to GOD! Every infant, child, man and woman! No matter where we live, what we drive, who we know, how we spend our time, God is still our Father in Heaven . And He is Our KING! This hangs in my girls room to remind them everyday who they are! And although I DETEST pageants for tiny kiddos, I do have a few tiaras around and on a few things, like these piggy banks !( they have tutus on too). I never want my kids to think that they are not worth anything to us and to God and Jesus Christ! We constantly remind them of all the people who love them . From birth family to extended family and friends, they know they are loved everyday! Brielle asked me last night... " Mommy, are princesses real?" i replied " Yes, Brielle, they are real and YOU are one of them b/c you are a Daughter of our Heavenly King, Our Father in Heaven, And He loves you and wants to see you behave like a princess everyday!" Her eyes got big and she said " I wish i could ...

(this is a RANT post- just so, you are ready) Lately, i've been reading a few birth mom blogs ( they give me strength and courage and hope) and i have been improving our profile , adding new and updated pictures and trying to figure out why my header is so dang blurry when in PS it's not!!! (I have re-sized it like 10 times-grr- as to not compress too many pixels) Anyway, I have been thinking about what the world must think of both birth parents and adoptive parents. Those who are not in our adoption world , say disgusting things about us like: "who'd ever give a child up, must be crazy" "adoptive parents only care about themselves" Parents who want to adopt more kids than 1 or 2 are baby hoarders and selfish people- be grateful you have any" " how could you think that someone could love a baby that is not of their own blood?" " I'd never adopt- i don't want to be a permanent uncle" " people who are adop...

Makes me Cry with JOY!!! I don't Care how, who, or where my future children come from. I don't care if my kids "match" my skin color. I don't even think twice about ME anymore b/c it's NOT about ME!!! It's about the children. I cry for different reasons all the time but, today, i cried watching a movie about a couple who adopted 2 babies from Ethiopia. It tugged at my heart strings and I remember meeting my friend Shay's newest Addition from Ethiopia. Her one and only Son, in house full of girls! He was gorgeous and so sweet and when i got to meet him, he was so friendly but, you could tell He knew who his mommy was. I asked Shay about why she chose Ethiopia- she said something like" it just felt like where we were being led to find him". I Often wonder if adoptive couples let themselves be LED in their adoption journeys anymore. I wonder the same thing for Birth Parents. I wonder if people are just going with the easiest, cheapest, or most...

Today, during a broadcast conference from leaders of our church, a phrase was repeated or paraphrased a few times over. This same theme was said in the conference for the 18+ female crowd at our RS conference, a week previous. This quote is one of my favorites and i have heard it for years and years. I first read it in a book by Stephen R. Covey - Spiritual Roots of Human Relations and I'm reading a book of his called the 7 Habits of Highly Effective Families- and he quoted this again. I finally found out where it originated from and here it is: David O' McKay, a prominent religious leader in our church,in 1954 stated that, " No success can compensate for failure in the home ." This is one of the wisest things i have ever heard- ever! Because- if you FAIL at being a GOOD and loving parent to your children- You will have God to deal with in the end. If you fail at work or making money but are a good parent- you just have creditors to deal with till you die. You may no...

I don't do this much but... Tonight, when i was biking home after a long evening with friends, I looked up at the beautiful moon in the night sky and was grateful it was there for me . I was also thinking about the myth or legend that you get pregnant when there's a full moon or you go into labor on a full moon! It's something to do with how woman's bodies are in harmony with the cycles of nature- yada yada yada (you get my drift). That thought lead to the thought of all the Ladies in the world who get pregnant with no intention of b eing a good mother to their babies. I thought of that b/c i have distant a relative who gets pregnant and has babies just to have the Gov't Handouts that come to poor, unfortunate people who have children!!! I am so upset at this group of humans in this world. I'm disgusted that you use your children as meal tickets. You procreate for CASH- which makes you a WHORE to the Gov't system. Seriously- this may seem harsh and I'm...